6 June 2007

finding gifts, each day



the things, times and tasks i will miss doing, catching and accomplishing, sometimes possible only because u are living on your own, in a different culture, time and place. sometimes, you seize many visions at one go. i have learnt not to put a full stop to life when God may have only placed a comma, better still, an ellipsis...

5 June 2007

education

just received 3 emails and some msns from my first 3 batches of students. wonderful always to hear a blast from the past. one of them just graduated from smu business (O1A01)and is going ahead to do an MA in Lit Studies in NUS, in spite of harmless protests and quizzical looks from pragmatic folks who wondered why she didn't want to do something more 'practical.' I call that courage. Her decision that is.


Another from the same class obtained an A for her hons thesis! On Changi Village. We shared the same supervisor and a serious love for anthropology. Again, one of the many subjects that nus, or rather the soci-dept has relegated away. it still thrives in ntu school of humanities thanks to Profs Kwok Kian Woon and Geoffery Benjamin. Head there, people!!!
Another lad (OOS24) switched from science to do arts and just managed to get a place in nus psych hons. he's tackling something on cognition and religion for his thesis. kewl! The other (OOS14) has been jet-setting elsewhere, having finished a summer course in the States. he quit nus architecture to do aeronautical engineering at ntu, all for the sheer love of planes. One unforgettable talkative stubborn verbal soul (still is) quit ntu mass com and followed his heart. finally got into nus law after 3 persistent endless appeals. somebody or something has to give in afterall- an inner call surpassing a faceless institution.




there are so many more whose names i've yet to mention. i particularly respect those who pushed on even though they did not manage to qualify for the so-called top unis here (one even rejected a place there) but have nonetheless gone on to chart their own learning journeys and lifepaths. one even quit varsity to set up his own business.











It's wonderful knowledge just sensing that each of them have grown to be autonomous individuals who are more than capable of standing apart and away (sometimes, that becomes a necessity) from narrow (and oh so subjective and relative) societal norms to pursue a responsible field of knowledge they really wanted and (more importantly), loved. To Cerina, Bingfeng, Shang, Vincent, Eric, Songhui, Cuili, Annie, Hazel and Alex...yep, gimme a five! nah, how a'bout a ten!!!
something i found from one of my readings...more than food for thought. my lecturers in nie (there was only one who seriously taught and shared herself as a teacher. i still remember her name...) were too busy covering the syllabus to help us critique this. ahem...


Education is not the art of training and subjugating people to serve the profit of others. It is the art of helping people to know themselves, to develop the resources of judgement and skills of learning and the sense of values needed on facing a future of unpredictable change, to understand the rights and responsibilities of adults in a democratic society and to exercise the greatest possible degree of control over their own fate. To educate is to look for truth, to stir discomfort in placid minds of the unthinking, to shake ideologies, disturb complacency, undermine the tyranny of anti-intellectual commercialism which reins in the marketplace and in some of our legislatures, to the disadvantage of all of us. To educate is to reject the false analogies of the marketplace, to see justice and equality as noble aims rather than as obstacles to a takeover bid, to insist that human progress has no bottom line.


What a challenge for everyone. Tough but worth more than a casual pursuit.... Grow, go and be on your way then......we each, must own our road...
































quote retrieved from Hoy and Miskel. (1987). Educational Administration: Theory, Research and Practice. New York: Random House

4 June 2007

this is the life!


final assignment done. one more touch-up to go for the other and already i am scribbling around to live the perfect mode of existence over here. i woke at 4 am and edited the marketing essay to completion. thanks again to all who did the surveys and gave me enough data to fill an 8000 word paper to the brrrrimm.








watched 2 movies today. a rare luxury that is quite impossible to fulfil in singapore. lygon nova (where artsy films are shown and atas undergrads / postgrads/ well-read lao ah soh and ah peks and yuppie taitais hang around) offers $5.50 films for everything screened before four. technically cheaper than home's. i caught Deliver Us From Evil and My Best Friend. The first film addresses the massive cover-up of some priests by the roman catholic archdiocese in los angeles concerning members of its clergy who committed pedophilia over the span of many years. it was shameful, chilling and shocking but it didn't surprise me. very painful to watch too but humbling to the core. it details the advocacy-work of catholics working within and outside the church to address the issue. impressed me so much i went ahead and got myself a copy to share with my community back home. a stark and needed contrast to another film about religious life i caught last year, Into Great Silence, about a group of carthusian monks in france. 3 hours of coarse & barren fidelity and one hears the purity of silence and the still small voice of the Lord. 2 faces of the same church. broken and whole, the body of Christ. faith lost, torn and challenged but some are healed and regained. what it means to be christian in today's world.... My Best Friend was done in the tradition of The 8th Day. the french piece dealt with friendship between 2 men, one who was divorced and betrayed, the other simply did not know how to be a friend. a humorous mix of masculine dialogue, materialism and desensitisation which finally ended in the most human discourse between 2 protangonists at the end of the film. all through a gameshow. thoughtful. and ever so subtle. definitely a far-cry from those jack neo's 'THIS IS THE INTENDED MEANING OF THIS FILM AND I WILL PASTE THEM TO YOUR FLAT FACE' kind of film-making. artless.

popped back home, mailed a few emails and cooked myself a swordfish steak topped with celery and japanese rice. cycled to return my crashload of books. always a relief to return these books back to the library. along the way, a line of yellow trees brightens the path. an enigmatic protest staged by some disgruntled undergrads towards the 'melbourne model' greeted me. an effigy from the uni emblem with torn angel wings overlooks several gravestones carved with different student id tags. i think i know why. will share with my class. cool.


sneaked into high-tech law library to blog. some students are smoking outside. winter blues. exam hues. more than thankful that postgrads are spared from all that old nonsense. i remember very quickly those pangs and crammings during my nus days. all over. well-deserved. country-road sale tomorrow. got myself a membership. advanced notice. up to 75% off. opens 8am tmr. some nice clothes to support my transition back to work. for now, the open space...breathe.











kid marvel





my formidable marvel & gp / dvd collection (everything from merciless dictatorships to environmental pollution, child abuse, empires and kingdoms, indigenous cultures, weapons of mass deception, bush-ology, queer, straight and transgender ideology, extraterrestial life, hollywood and holocaust, cubism, lennon, democracy, drugs and sex, animal testing, genetic patent(ing), commerce and contamination, adverts and sexploitation, pandemics, haiku, endangered animals, gandhi, princess di & pol pot ) grows bigger each day. just made a vintage gambit and grouchy looking man-thing engage in battle while magneto and doc-oc stand bochap by the shelves. both grin in despicable delight. they will join my home collection in 2 weeks and start an orgy of laser beams, force fields, power blasts and brainy kicksmarts to come...yeah!


2 June 2007

10 minute vision










i did say we boarded a chopper, didn't i? a side offering of the great ocean drive that i took family along...


and the view from the cockpit just underneath a canvas of space. the white winds and blue surfs of sky. nothing but miles of land and ocean. hard to believe i was right there, almost touching the tip of a continent.





i look back and see the weeks ending. all too soon. gone so soon. still, the vision is pure; the height and depth of my thanksgiving.

a home to belong



family visited for the week. it is good to travel again and see the years of common growth and conflict maturing into a kind of richness & quiet depth i cannot find elsewhere. some say we can choose our friends but not our family. leunig once penned these thoughtful lines in one of his collection: 'Love one another and you will be happy. It is as simple and as difficult as that. There is no other way.' indeed, there is no other way. seems like a constraint on the surface but a decision and a necessary commitment, for a lifetime. it's a daily miracle i have learnt to behold and treasure on my hands.



it speaks for all families. given, gifted, happened indeed. the first face of the beloved and of God for me.



my best memories of the many trips we took: sis, children and me playing & scattering autumn leaves on a wide expanse of grass...dad , sis , ig & myself boarding a chopper overseeing the ocean, veron feeding wild parakeets in the rain and mom finally, learning to see. another picture of autumn- blessing the days that went by so swiftly. and yet, are there to stay.


some portions of our lives will require us walk a road we would rather not go. but there is only one way, and no other. there is little else to do except to stretch out your hands and be willing to be led. i'm glad i did, and was given a grace to follow through.

















30 May 2007

retracing


and bearing the silence, you hear your name. spoken in time, and pushed back again. there is only so much left to say. polite talk takes us nowhere. i thought once was enough. and then, it came back and the haunt begins . this grieving must stop. get back on feet. will afford to have less. not the first time. i will be ok.

waiting once...

Tis better to have loved and lost
than never to have loved at all...

lord alfred tennyson

26 May 2007

one breath


a long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...



23 May 2007

Star Wars 30th Anniversary

As reported in www.starwars.com: hardcore fans converged at the LA Convention Centre to celebrate the 3oth anniversary of Lucas' smash hit. On the first day of the event, thousands gathered to sit through a screening of all 6 Star Wars films, prequels and all, a full 17 hours...dressed as their favourite characters. Wished i was there... :( yoda seems to be reminiscing to luke...












How could we ever forget?


Characters...




Fighters and Starships





and more to come...


life-passage

drew this on a retreat some years back...do i still remember my story?




poem on my wall



18 May 2007

wolf & francis

kieran shared 2 paintings with me. am reminded of the life of st francis of assisi (1182-1226) who influenced my early understandings about creation, God and humanity during the childhood years...





banished and feared. you walked untouched among people. the villagers ready to greet you with clubs, spikes and spears. your grey fur catching the remnant-cold of country rain as you hide among cliffs. bruised by hunger, you wonder why created order became so cruel when you merely hunted what you sought and ate what you could. the fire people threatened the forest with greater rage. the growl hides your helplessness. your cornered curl of lips and sharp jawed inner pain.

one day, a brown man came. browned by the sun and earth, his garments a torn reflection of God-given joyful poverty. francis his name. francis, a name bearing the scent of pine and humble humid soil, in letters so near to Christ's. he bent low, those eyes you can't forget. utter trust. a freeing vulnerability before Creator-Lord who brought us into being. a simple heart that reaches out to your own. unafraid. he stayed the night with me. metres away. humble lowly francis couched among the trees, praying. smiling from a distance as he looked into me. renaming my savagery.

the villagers departed that day, content to let me be. i was only a fractured reflection of their own absence, abusive cruelty. francis came back and touched me. and i licked his warm calloused hand. the morning light bearing grace. presence of life made whole. i ran back to the far forests of my food and dream. and looked back one final time and saw one villager with francis. the browned friar always knew. he turned and blessed my name.
------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

----from the life of st francis of assisi (1182-1226)

www.conservation.catholic.org/st_francis_of_assisi.html

water-colour paintings by kieran choy, singapore. first icon from website.

17 May 2007

unlike any other pears


french pear. sweet as sin. sinfully sweet. two for AUD one fifty. sold exclusively.

dr octavius and magneto

dr octavius and magneto confront the alien object that had just landed on earth's tabletops. octavius's near adamantium claws pince and nudge the foreign substance for any sign of ultimate threat while magneto discovers that he cannot lift the organic lifeform because it possesses no metallic properties at all.

the two villains will soon depart for singapore. joining the battle with omega-red, ultron, bullseye, sabretooth, loki and blackheart against hulk-maestro and the sentinel. the x-men and avengers have since joined the fray. watch this space...the confrontations to come-

x-men roll call: angel, beast & nightcrawler

avengers roll-call: dr strange, hawkeye, captain america & thor