lor gambas: checkpoint 93

we can no longer tell
the difference between the cool jade of forest leaves and
the warm odour of sun melting sleeves, socks and boots.

the ground stings
with over-heated grass.
we can only stretch eyes this far,
attain some luck in stumbling, or succumbing
to the rising spells of emerald heat.

and there is fear of sundown...

our dreams morph

into sharpened ferns, chanting fields and

a moss of creatures creeping

to make sick these fantasies whispered

on our congealed beds of sweat raw chlorophyll...

the tale of the dead soldier lying beyond the night marsh -
he waits to join us again,

complete his final march.

* * * *** ***

my buddy treks behind me.
the day will not make him disappear.
his wet pores and clenched fists
secrete a secret will

to drag our bodies forth
to base camp.

never to arrive,
our desires liquify, blessing the ground
of our sacrifice.

picture courtesy of xiangxuan's account of ocs in facebook

heartspace

heartspace. i joined this community sometime last year, wanting to devote more time to ecology (i got my zoo posting!) and art to balance life & work. we meet on sat mornings. begin with sharing and close with a prayer, sometimes through song, a line from scripture or just begin a day framed in silence. and then we disperse into our own corners and pick materials of our choice. the hours pass in a simple play of colours. are allowed to experiment with any medium we wish; acrylic, crayon, clay, chinese brush, charcoal...anything that helps our heart to speak. when all is done, we place our works (in progress), sit back, distance ourselves from our pieces and comment on each others' works. there is no judgement. no appraisal. no grading. just (he)art speaking to (he)art, trusting the Spirit to guide us.

over here, i find courage to exorcise an old burden and rechart other undiscovered lands. i remember failing art for o-levels and labelled myself as a failure in that field for so many years. i never picked it up again until i joined heartspace. and these are the works i still create...the first piece was done in less than 2 minutes...a hurried attempt not to waste ink...i ceased the need to control. and spontaneity led to its genesis. for the second piece...i did not know the painting could be inverted (without losing its coherence) until another member told me so! 7 months lapsed between the 2 pieces i drew. the same blue tree appeared and inked the link between them. i still do not know what the blue tree said.

others resurrect a memory or loved one who went away. some portraits emerge from the dark terrain of searching and prayer, to reclaim a lost promise you once held with open hands.

you don't come here wanting to be an artist. you come- open, wanting to understand the process of becoming yourself again. though many members happen to be christian, we also welcome persons from other faiths as well. one of our members happens to be a buddhist who brings a different reading of life in her sharing.

i guess we don't always have a ready answer or reason for everything we draw. and it is ok to feel that way.

the same for life, wonder, love, pain, dreams and mystery. we don't always know their origins or haunting appeal to our spirit and psyche. but we chase, run away or experience them anyway...our need to be human is a gift we long to behold and re-create.


www.joannatan.com/heartspace.htm