my friend now lies in bed, waiting to receive surgery. and it's a major one. to those who may be reading this, please say a simple prayer to support my friend....---------------------------------------------------------------------------
Hello friends of Julian
Bad news. Julian collapsed on Monday evening and began vomiting blood. He was taken to Waikato Hospital and diagnosed yesterday. He's got stomach cancer. A tumor has been found, unfortunately alongside a lymph node. No other tumors have been found. He's not in pain now, and is in good spirits. He's been considering which of two treatment options to follow, and is inclining towards immediate surgery, followed later by chemotherapy. The surgery may well take place on Friday, and if not, Monday.
Stomach surgery has a 3% chance of mortality, though Julian's young age and general strength and fitness probably lessen that percentage.
Surgery will need to be followed by one or two weeks of convalescence in Waikato Hospital. He'll have rather a lot of pain, because the operation can't be done via a keyhole but only by a broad incision, or perhaps two broad incisions.
After another six weeks, if all goes well he'll be able to begin a course of chemotherapy.
The chances of a successful treatment are not strikingly good; only from 25% to 37% of people treated with surgery/chemo for stomach cancers have no problem with recurrence of the cancer after five years.
Julian thinks he'll stay in Hamilton for a while, to see whether he can manage after a few weeks to work part-time at the consultancy job he enjoys so much. If things get too difficult, he may shift back to Wellington. He's got three good friends in Hamilton: his flatmate Lauren, and Simon and Dee, but he's conscious that all three are very recent friends and that helping someone who's reeling a bit from chemo is a big job to ask of anyone. His most solid base of friends is in Wellington, so it might make sense to make the move.
I came up from Wellington yesterday, together with Gary. I'm able to stay here till next Monday. Gary will be able to come back over the weekend. Gary and I have talked about maybe alternating weekends after that, taking turns coming up from Wellington.
Cecilia has been deeply upset by the news, but is being brilliant; very supportive. The family has asked him to go back to Singapore, to get his treament there, where he can be supported by the family. Julian feels that he prefers to stay in NZ.
Eddie is going to come to Hamilton next month, when he has holidays from his school.
Julian has asked me to act as a sort of call centre in the meanwhile, and to send out email bulletins. He's finding it hard to cope with breaking the news. His mum, for example, immediately began pleading with him to go straight back home. He feels he has to put the emotions on a bit of a drip feed until he's sorted out his first few steps. Please txt or email me, though, if you'd like any messages passed on to him in the meantime. He's got a tough time ahead, and I know we all will be sending strong thoughts towards him, and in some cases prayers.
Bad news. Julian collapsed on Monday evening and began vomiting blood. He was taken to Waikato Hospital and diagnosed yesterday. He's got stomach cancer. A tumor has been found, unfortunately alongside a lymph node. No other tumors have been found. He's not in pain now, and is in good spirits. He's been considering which of two treatment options to follow, and is inclining towards immediate surgery, followed later by chemotherapy. The surgery may well take place on Friday, and if not, Monday.
Stomach surgery has a 3% chance of mortality, though Julian's young age and general strength and fitness probably lessen that percentage.
Surgery will need to be followed by one or two weeks of convalescence in Waikato Hospital. He'll have rather a lot of pain, because the operation can't be done via a keyhole but only by a broad incision, or perhaps two broad incisions.
After another six weeks, if all goes well he'll be able to begin a course of chemotherapy.The chances of a successful treatment are not strikingly good; only from 25% to 37% of people treated with surgery/chemo for stomach cancers have no problem with recurrence of the cancer after five years.
Julian thinks he'll stay in Hamilton for a while, to see whether he can manage after a few weeks to work part-time at the consultancy job he enjoys so much. If things get too difficult, he may shift back to Wellington. He's got three good friends in Hamilton: his flatmate Lauren, and Simon and Dee, but he's conscious that all three are very recent friends and that helping someone who's reeling a bit from chemo is a big job to ask of anyone. His most solid base of friends is in Wellington, so it might make sense to make the move.
I came up from Wellington yesterday, together with Gary. I'm able to stay here till next Monday. Gary will be able to come back over the weekend. Gary and I have talked about maybe alternating weekends after that, taking turns coming up from Wellington.
Cecilia has been deeply upset by the news, but is being brilliant; very supportive. The family has asked him to go back to Singapore, to get his treament there, where he can be supported by the family. Julian feels that he prefers to stay in NZ.
Eddie is going to come to Hamilton next month, when he has holidays from his school.
Julian has asked me to act as a sort of call centre in the meanwhile, and to send out email bulletins. He's finding it hard to cope with breaking the news. His mum, for example, immediately began pleading with him to go straight back home. He feels he has to put the emotions on a bit of a drip feed until he's sorted out his first few steps. Please txt or email me, though, if you'd like any messages passed on to him in the meantime. He's got a tough time ahead, and I know we all will be sending strong thoughts towards him, and in some cases prayers.
cheers, stevan
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Hi again
I'm just back at Julian's flat after another day back and forth to the hospital. Our boy is walking about now, and still in good spirits. Tomorrow he gets discharged for a couple of days, before going back into hospital on Sunday. The surgery will be on Monday afternoon.
He's had friends dropping in all day, and txts and phone calls, so feels like a star. Which he is, of course.
The likely timetable now, so long as all goes well with the surgery and the convalescence, will be chemotherapy beginning about the middle of July. He's planning to take up an offer to stay with Dee and Simon, whose house is near the hospital and who've got a bedroom with its own ensuite on the lower floor. They'll be close at hand. in other words, but he'll still have his own space. He'll also keep his room at Lauren's house until it's clear what will be happening in the longer term.
Stuart drove here from Kawerau to spend most of today with him, and among other very helpful things he went down to WINZ to start the paperwork of an application for a sickness benefit, which Julian will need if he's not able to manage two or three days of work a week. The sickness benefit is pretty meagre: $184 a week, but if things get too tough his family in Singapore can be a backstop.
He's decided not to go back to Singapore. His parents will fly to Hamilton about two weeks from now and stay for a week or two. He's not exactly sure it'll be a good thing, given that his relationships with them are fairly conflicted, and also given that his mother doesn't have a very good track record of nursing him when he's been ill! However, he's good at not taking shit, Julian, so if they end up feeling more like albatrosses around his neck than guardian angels he promises he'll send them packing. Cecilia and Julius are very staunch, but apart from them he feels that his close friends are his true family.
I'm staying in Hamilton till Monday. Gary will be here for the weekend. Stuart will come immediately after the operation. Dee and Simon will also be keeping an eye out.
The autumn days here right now are radiant, calm and magical, which helps him a lot, to0. He looks out of a window onto the orange, yellow and golden heads of thousands of trees.
Cheers ,
Stevan
I'm just back at Julian's flat after another day back and forth to the hospital. Our boy is walking about now, and still in good spirits. Tomorrow he gets discharged for a couple of days, before going back into hospital on Sunday. The surgery will be on Monday afternoon.
He's had friends dropping in all day, and txts and phone calls, so feels like a star. Which he is, of course.
The likely timetable now, so long as all goes well with the surgery and the convalescence, will be chemotherapy beginning about the middle of July. He's planning to take up an offer to stay with Dee and Simon, whose house is near the hospital and who've got a bedroom with its own ensuite on the lower floor. They'll be close at hand. in other words, but he'll still have his own space. He'll also keep his room at Lauren's house until it's clear what will be happening in the longer term.Stuart drove here from Kawerau to spend most of today with him, and among other very helpful things he went down to WINZ to start the paperwork of an application for a sickness benefit, which Julian will need if he's not able to manage two or three days of work a week. The sickness benefit is pretty meagre: $184 a week, but if things get too tough his family in Singapore can be a backstop.
He's decided not to go back to Singapore. His parents will fly to Hamilton about two weeks from now and stay for a week or two. He's not exactly sure it'll be a good thing, given that his relationships with them are fairly conflicted, and also given that his mother doesn't have a very good track record of nursing him when he's been ill! However, he's good at not taking shit, Julian, so if they end up feeling more like albatrosses around his neck than guardian angels he promises he'll send them packing. Cecilia and Julius are very staunch, but apart from them he feels that his close friends are his true family. I'm staying in Hamilton till Monday. Gary will be here for the weekend. Stuart will come immediately after the operation. Dee and Simon will also be keeping an eye out.The autumn days here right now are radiant, calm and magical, which helps him a lot, to0. He looks out of a window onto the orange, yellow and golden heads of thousands of trees.
Cheers ,
Stevan
All around us, we have known you; 
