love and freedom

The things and people we cling to imprison us; the things and people we love free us. The most liberating experience of all is to love something or someone and not at the same time want to possess the object of our love. True love allows the other its own freedom, yes, even desires that freedom; and in return the lover himself is free to love more and more selflessly.


Who, however, can achieve such love? Maybe no one can completely. But each one of us glimpses from time to time the exquisite joy of his own selflessnes. If i am willing to love you and let you go wherever you wish, we are both free and our love grows. Otherwise, need and dependence replace love, and we grow tired of what all of this is costing us emotionally.
Some of us learn this basic fact of life, and they become the contented and authentic souls we all know. Others never do learn it, and they are constantly caught in webs of their own making, unable to break loose and enjoy the freedom gifted by real love.




adapted: murray bodo

everyday...a prayer is heard.

a typical day runs like footwork...

thoughts creep up from nowhere and i scribble quickly on scrap paper (poached from the waste-dept at edfac... while no one is looking, hehe- not stealing ya!) so it goes...the things i must do for the day...

-check bank refund
-subscribe to papers
-top-up optus prepaid card
-buy indo-chilli from laguna
-develop family pics
-enquire if swimming shorts allowed at unipool
-tell cousin those pics were sent back!!! (after almost 5 mths!!!)

strangely i feel a sense of accomplishment after these things are done. the day opens up empty but it is gradually filled with little decisions that axel a day's movement somewhat. i look forward to daily mass, something simple to commit to during lent. i share with God everything that has happened so far. honesty and openness. relationships. what we apply in our human affairs untimately reflects his place in our lives. to personalise it further is to risk intimacy and a depthing that brings challenges of its own. yet if there is no intimacy to speak of, there can be no genuine relationship to begin with. Cassian says we pray best when we are no longer aware of praying...do i believe that God is intimately involved and is concerned with every detail of my life? do i find that intrusive or comforting? if so, why?

my meals are getting more arty by the day. used warmed over-nite rice...simply scatter it with basil and mixed herbs. next, tossed it with anchovies (pre-stir-fried with ginger) raw spinach, rockets, boccocini cheese and a dollop of kimchi, or a slice of cold ham. yop it with minutes of pesto sauce and ta-dah... you have the most filling vitamin-mind-blowing meal ever prepared by yours truly...whenever i crave for fish, i would add a smoked trout by the side and drizzle with lemon juice. lunch can't get better than this.

am doing a little more light (haha) shopping this final semester...tag on stuff unavailable in singapore. green is theme. these are funky shoes...doubt i can find that in queenway, junction 8, orchard and the like. wah!

i didn't forget how the day closed for me. watched the sky as the last fires of sunset burned. right outside my window. i ate my meal in silence. seeing, tasting, hearing...i don't know if i 'was' truly praying but the awareness itself...is thanksgiving.