just received 3 emails and some msns from my first 3 batches of students. wonderful always to hear a blast from the past. one of them just graduated from smu business (O1A01)and is going ahead to do an MA in Lit Studies in NUS, in spite of harmless protests and quizzical looks from pragmatic folks who wondered why she didn't want to do something more 'practical.' I call that courage. Her decision that is.
Another from the same class obtained an A for her hons thesis! On Changi Village. We shared the same supervisor and a serious love for anthropology. Again, one of the many subjects that nus, or rather the soci-dept has relegated away. it still thrives in ntu school of humanities thanks to Profs Kwok Kian Woon and Geoffery Benjamin. Head there, people!!!
Another lad (OOS24) switched from science to do arts and just managed to get a place in nus psych hons. he's tackling something on cognition and religion for his thesis. kewl! The other (OOS14) has been jet-setting elsewhere, having finished a summer course in the States. he quit nus architecture to do aeronautical engineering at ntu, all for the sheer love of planes. One unforgettable talkative stubborn
verbal soul (still is) quit ntu mass com and followed his heart. finally got into nus law after 3 persistent endless appeals. somebody or something has to give in afterall- an inner call surpassing a faceless institution.
there are so many more whose names i've yet to mention. i particularly respect those who pushed on even though they did not manage to qualify for the so-called top uni
s here (one even rejected a place there) but have nonetheless gone on to chart their own learning journeys and lifepaths. one even quit varsity to set up his own business.
It's wonderful knowledge just sensing that each of them have grown to be autonomous individuals who are more than capable of standing apart and away (sometimes, that becomes a necessity) from narrow (and oh so subjective and relative) societal norms to pursue a responsible field of knowledge they really wanted and (more importantly), loved. To Cerina, Bingfeng, Shang, Vincent, Eric, Songhui, Cuili, Annie, Hazel and Alex...yep, gimme a five! nah, how a'bout a ten!!!
something i found from one of my readings...more than food for thought. my lecturers in nie (there was only one who seriously taught and shared herself as a teacher. i still remember her name...) were too busy covering the syllabus to help us critique this.
ahem...
Education is not the art of training and subjugating people to serve the profit of others. It is the art of helping people to know themselves, to develop the resources of judgement and skills of learning and the sense of values needed on facing a future of unpredictable change, to understand the rights and
responsibilities of adults in a democratic society and to exercise the greatest possible degree of control over their own fate. To educate is to look for truth, to stir discomfort in placid minds of the unthinking, to shake ideologies, disturb complacency, undermine the tyranny of anti-intellectual commercialism which reins in the marketplace and in some of our legislatures, to the disadvantage of all of us. To educate is to reject the false analogies of the marketplace, to see justice and equality as noble aims rather than as obstacles to a takeover bid, to insist that human progress has no bottom line. 
What a challenge for everyone. Tough but worth more than a casual pursuit.... Grow, go and be on your way then......we each, must own our road...
quote retrieved from Hoy and Miskel. (1987). Educational Administration: Theory, Research and Practice. New York: Random House
pat, as always, timed her painting to arrive from s'pore just when i was about to leave for home. it speaks alot to the closures i've been making. the reflections made. coming through a forest, darkening but surely, a darkness that is freeing. she knows where we've been. 
received this emblem of the good shepherd from calvin. a gift from the cathedral. jesus holding the lamb, framed by the vine and branches. the cross, a sacrifice. the lamb, each other, family, friends even our faith...to be blessed, held, cared for , then set free to give life to others. much like, teaching as a vocation. a meditation on john 15: 1-17. and john 10: 14-16. Word of God, with me since the beginning of life... Cross of Christ challenging and guiding us for a lifetime.
umbrella got shredded apart. i learnt to lean on my windbreaker instead. footsteps impeded by wind and rain. shoes and socks, wet. slept with winds hissing outside my window. raindrops pattering till dawn. next day, managed to meet up with writer boey kim cheng for coffee. his friends call him kim. i followed suit. shared about family, travel, life, teaching and poetry. his latest collection too and a collection of prose to be published in singapore soon. he remembered pjc. said he returned to singapore last dec. and was invited to share some of his works with other jcs here. pioneer left an impression which others did not: our students were somewhat more keen, engaging, appreciative and humble than the rest he said. i beamed with pride. we also managed to catch one of the most original movies i've watched this year...paris je'taime. 
a french-english montage of stories about people falling, journeying, making, rediscovering, tolerating, feasting, breaking, living, sensing love. in paris, city of lights, mythical city of that one lost elusive emotion we call love. this film took me beyond the realm of emotion. it taught and showed much. love beyond its cloying sweetness. love in all its groundedness. i remember the new scents emitted from those short confectionary of stories. some are multilingual yet every piece is woven by a common language we are all familiar with. my fav. piece involved a blind lad and his galfren. cut-throat narrative, a heartfelt poem in voice and visuals. there were others of equal worth and dignity - man and mamasan, papasan and his apparent lass, art and artist, young and old, adult and teenager, married and/or divorced, fidelity and promiscuity, parent and child, 
straight and /or gay, strangers and friends, muslim and non-believer (or so we thought), migrant and immigrant, mortal and immortal, a communal solitaire, near east and distant west, between life, beyond death...many big names and some directors contributed their creative thought to this quiet masterpiece: elijah wood, natalie portman, gerard depardieu, juliette binoche, the late oscar wilde (haha) and even wes craven (!). an ethereal voiceover song from faye wong's tian kong took my head off my neck! kim sniggered. i laughed my heart out and almost broke my seat for that one postmodern piece. so darn intelligent and yet so subtle on its intent. the entire ensemble was always celebratory and elegiac in form. a rare vintage of fluid thought, self contained visions and miniature portions of truth. i wished every take became a portrait or book i could take home or share in a literature classroom. i will watch it again. it has too much to teach. and many chapters to share. still, more doors to be opened. paris je'taime... > 12 characters. 12 lives. one common road. one film. 
john who burns dvds for me in exchange for meals like these. he burn i cook. we eat. share talk videos. govt. badawi. racism. church. our plain good life in melbourne. maidi whom God sent in the last minute when my computer crashed for the week. 2 8000 word assignment at stake! solid neighbours. solid folks. i am the oooldest of all. they are still undergrads in tow. 3 big and generous singaporeans lodged in the middle of winter. battling a recent burglar and one eeevil estate manager. we all know who she is..shhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh
grace touches you at an unknown hour and the road widened, with every gateway falling away. the more i walked and explored, the more tangible the thought became. confirming your quiet call. leading on. courage received. one season of uncertainty and the rich fullness of another three. an awaited arrival. complete the harvest, now. a return home to grace. everything i hold in my hand. 
this kingdom you described is not some abstract palace in the sky. it is life, given and gifted to me. in full and humble recognition of your footprints, our journeying, yours' beside mine. i remember your mercy Lord and the love you have shown from of old. do not remember the straying paths of my youth, but in your love, remember me. 
gratitude for life, received...well-lived. fifteen more. and still, so many more daygifts to be opened. i'm ready to go, Lord. knowing, in leaving, i live. closing one life and re-opening another. finding and reclaiming my faith in You again, once more. 
some portions of our lives will require us walk a road we would rather not go. but there is only one way, and no other. there is little else to do except to stretch out your hands and be willing to be led. i'm glad i did, and was given a grace to follow through.
